| Pasty Teen Resents Airport Security's Lack of Interest |
| NEWARK, NJ- A pasty-white teen reported feelings of resentment after airport security failed to view him as a threat, despite the feelings of angst which have been building inside him during recent months. He could be dangerous. He could do something. The teen followed his train of thought to its logical conclusion, dorks in trenchcoats, and dropped the subject. FAA officials did not immediately return phone calls seeking comment. |